MARCH MADNESS IS FINALLY HERE - MIKE IN DA

Selection Sunday has come and gone. I realized an important advantage offered by last year’s NCAA decision to expand the tournament field to 68 teams.

In the past, we had Sunday night and all day Monday to listen to shouts about what team got screwed over by the Selection Committee and rebuttals to that nonsense. Then we had all day Tuesday to talk about first round upsets and bracket-busting games that might or might not happen somewhere down the line in the tournament. Then we had all day Wednesday to talk about obscure players on good teams or obscure teams. The games did not happen until Thursday.




This year, we get to compress all that noise into a day and a half because the games, which are actual tournament games, start on Tuesday. I don't know about you, but cutting down on that predictable and usually nonsensical bullshit chatter seems like a good thing to me.

Let me now say that the NCAA has reached a new level of hypocrisy by allowing both Bruce Pearl and Jim Calhoun to be on the bench for tournament games. Pearl is an admitted cheat and liar; Calhoun “failed to create an environment conducive to compliance” with NCAA rules. And, they are still there.


This tournament seems to be a lot more “wide-open” than ones in recent years. I do not think there is a “dominant/great” team in the field this year; rather, there are at least a half-dozen teams who are serious threats to win it all and probably a dozen teams who could wind up with the championship without surprising me. I think this tournament should be more fun than some of the stiffs we had this past decade, especially with the improved TV coverage and equal spacing of the games.

Conference Tournament Exhibition Season, where coaches of the best teams in the best conferences don’t care, and where the results don’t have much to do with what will happen next, is done.

The #1 Seed Tournament with 64 Other Teams in it is here! Yay. According to the announcers, every team that has a lead will be exhibiting its “toughness.” Every player that makes a shot will be exhibiting his “toughness.” Except, when that “tough” team suddenly falls behind after having led for a while. Then, it’s the other team suddenly being “tougher” than the team and the players previously touted by the announcers as having been “tough.”

Enjoy the NCAA Tournament for both entertainment and profit purposes! When you’re winning, it’s a lot easier to be entertained by – or at least tolerate - the nonsensical over-hyping of every second of every pre-game, in-game, and post-game. Given the participation of TNT, TBS, and whatever truTV might be, for live telecasts this year – in addition to flagship CBS that under-performed solo for so long -- the blah-blah-blah in mindless announcer-speak will hit an all-time high in lows.

You’ve already noticed the phenomenon of announcers who just can’t help being obsessed by seeds. This is probably because they were dropped from the Idiot Tree, which was sprouted from idiot seeds that were sprinkled over the landscape. Let’s repeat something mentioned here several times before: Seeds are for squares and stiffs. Attempting to forecast the NCAA Tournament by historical seed performance is for amateurs.


There are only 60-something NCAA Tournament games a year, so no matter how the seeds happen to be sown by committee clowns wearing suits, the historical result sample is way too small for any conclusions to be meaningful. On any given Saturday, there are twice as many college basketball games as there are in an entire NCAA Tournament! Therefore, overall point-spreads and results are a far better barometer for projecting results.

Straight-Up win percentages are progressively inversely proportional to the number of points being taken. This should help all the Bracket Boys out there get a handle on the frequency of outright wins by an underdog of a particular size. But we must once again note that betting on these games individually, on a pick-and-choose basis, offers a greater chance to win than does the over-hyped process of filling out a bracket, even if the bracket contest is free of charge.


Bracket Boy has only one chance to win, based on the collective result of 60-something games of “forced play.” The point-spread player has 60-something opportunities to review, and can be selective about them. The point-spread player also has a greater margin for error. For example, if the Crier projects a 9-point underdog to win outright by 1 point, and it loses the game by 1 point: Bracket Boys on that team are hard-luck losers; ATS Men on that team are comfortable winners.

THE NAME GAME

Below are some of the All-Tournament Teams with themes that will never occur to the folks on CBS and the other networks that will bring you the games. First will be an All-Tournament Team dedicated to copy editors on the night desks of newspapers around the country. Everyone knows the grief those folks take when they put someone’s name in the paper, but they spell it wrong. So, here is the Copy Editors’ All-Tournament Nightmare Team:




Nicola Cvetinovic - Akron
Aziz N’Diaye - Washington
Jamal Olasewere - Long Island University
Kenny Onyechi - Long Island University
Evan Smotryez - Michigan
Steve Tchiengang - Vanderbilt
Mouphtaou Yarou - Villanova


Here is the Real Estate Agents’ All-Tournament Team:

Jon Flowers - West Virginia
Jon House - Belmont
Derwin Kitchen - Florida State
Ty Proffitt - Morehead State
Nathan Walkup - Texas A&M


Next, we have the Two First-Names All-Tournament Team:

Andre Cornelius - George Mason
Stu Douglas - Michigan
Kris Joseph - Syracuse
Cory Joseph - Texas
Casey Mitchell - West Virginia
Carl Richard - Indiana State
Cameron Tatum - Tennessee


To maintain symmetry, here is the Two Last-Names All-Tournament Team:


Harrison Barnes - UNC
Brady Jardine - Utah State
Kendall Marshall - UNC
Jordan Morgan - Michigan
Reeves Nelson - UCLA
Jordan Printy - Indiana State
Nolan Smith - Duke
Myles Walker - Indiana State


Here is an All-Tournament Team made up of players with names that you thought have no NCAA eligibility left:


Gilbert Brown - Pitt
Mike Davis - Illinois
Tim Hardaway - Michigan
Isaiah Thomas - Washington
Brian Williams - Tennessee


Here is an All-Tournament Team to honor the people who work in the paint department at Home Depot:

Tarik Black - Memphis
Vander Blue - Marquette
Gilbert Brown - Pitt
Draymond Green - Michigan State
Ivory White - Alabama State


CRIER’S CORNER


BASKETBALL ACTION


Yesterday’s Record ATS: 3-1
W - MIAMI* (-4.5) over SAN ANTONIO
L - NEW ORLEANS* (-2.5) over DENVER
W - UTAH* (+1.5) over PHILADELPHIA


COLLEGE INSIDER’S TOURNAMENT
W - BUFFALO (-1) over QUINNIPIAC*


Cumulative Season Record ATS (excludes “pushes”): 507-313

NBA

MILWAUKEE at ATLANTA* (Over 173.5)
It’s just hard to take a positive stance about the Bucks since they struggle to score. The Hawks are only 1-2 vs. Milwaukee this season, but in the last loss they just turned the ball over too many times while failing to stop Earl Boykens off the bench. Atlanta has been tougher when Josh Smith goes to the hoop hard. ATLANTA, 103 - 96


NEW YORK (-4.5) over INDIANA*
The Pacers beat this team on Sunday by 13, but there were reasons. Carmelo Anthony was in foul trouble and New York as a whole could not stop Tyler Hansborough. Look for Ronnie Turiaf and Amar’e to tighten up the defense on that up and coming player. Toney Douglas has improved and has been giving Chauncey Billups some rest. Landry Fields also makes good decisions with the ball shooting nearly 52%. NEW YORK, 110 - 101

COLLEGE HOOPS

NCAA (at Dayton, OH)
ARKANSAS LITTLE ROCK (+4.5) over NC ASHEVILLE
UAB (+4.5) over CLEMSON


NIT
CHARLESTON* (-5) over DAYTON
VERMONT (+11) over CLEVELAND STATE*
ALABAMA* (-12.5) over COASTAL CAROLINA
BOSTON COLLEGE (-5.5) over McNEESE STATE*


CBI
DAVIDSON* (-2) over JAMES MADISON
SAN JOSE STATE (+11) over CREIGHTON*


CIT
EAST TENNESSEE STATE* (-5) over FURMAN
NORTHERN IOWA* (-6.5) over RIDER




MIKE IN DA

HMW