COMMENTS FROM THE PEANUT GALLERY (X-RATED) - MIKE IN DA

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COMMENTS FROM THE PEANUT GALLERY (X-RATED)

Written by: Mike in DA
Date posted: 3/26/2011

ALEX TREBEK ANNOUNING STANFORD - OREGON:

Alex Trebek Stan oregon




THIS WEEK IN SPORTS HISTORY (MARCH 25-31) IF OUR LOCAL SPORTS TALKERS TOLD IT!



MARCH 25, 1916

Heavyweight champion Jess Willard battled Frank Moran to a 10-round no-decision in the first boxing match that women were allowed to attend. Women had long been prevented from attending boxing matches because men of the age were worried they would learn how to properly take a punch.





MARCH 26, 1992

Mike Tyson was sentenced to 10 years in prison for raping Desiree Washington. Tyson said he regretted to discover that his defense attorney was pregnable.






MARCH 27, 1902

The Chicago Orphans were renamed the Chicago Cubs. Although the name was much cuter, still no one wanted to adopt any of the unloved and abandoned bastards.














MARCH 28, 1963

Team owner Sonny Werblin announced the New York Titans would change its name to the New York Jets. Werblin said the reason was because market research showed fans had trouble remembering "Titans."












MARCH 29, 1989

The first Soviet hockey players were permitted to play in the NHL. Goalie Vladimir Lenin stopped the first 10 shots against him until opposing players learned to shoot over his corpse.





MARCH 30, 1889

John T. Reid unveiled the first golf course in the United States, a converted Yonkers, NY, cow pasture, and named it St. Andrews in honor of the famed Scottish links. "Golf Digest" named the tract "Best New Design of 1889."





MARCH 31, 1973

Unknown heavyweight Ken Norton broke Muhammad Ali's jaw en route to a 12-round decision over the former champ in Norton’s hometown of San Diego. After the match, Ali boasted: "I float like a butterfly, sting like a.... Oh! Fuck! It really hurts when I talk."




HEY JOSH, WHAT ABOUT HMW?

In Tuesday’s (3/22) online Houston Press, its “Hair Balls” (HB) column by Steve Jansen took a comical shot at SR 610’s “Smokin’ 16” Houston's Hottest Women in the Media bracket tourney that has been a large part of the J&R (“Josh Innes and Rich Lord” for the acronym-challenged) Show (http://blogs.houstonpress.com/hairballs/2011/03/hottest_houston_media_women_to.php?fbc_channel=1) while the NCAA Tournament has been going on.

In a December 20, 2010 “Hair Balls”, Jeff Balke wrote about the odd coupling of J&R, so this week’s “Hair Balls” was not the first time HB made comments about the show. As far as Josh is concerned, he doesn’t care if the comments are naughty or nice, just as long as people are talking about him. In the 12/20 blog, Jeff flubbed, saying Josh is a grad of LSU. He might have graduated from Life Support Unit , but definitely not Louisiana State University, as he’s told us so many times, that he sounds proud of it.

Excerpts from this week’s HB article of 3/22 were read on air and Josh extended an open invitation to “Hair Balls” to spend an hour in studio with Rich and himself.


Hey Josh, HMW is waiting for its one-hour invitation to observe Rich and you in the studio.

GIVE BARKLEY SOME CREDIT!

On Thursday night, Charles Barkley picked Arizona to beat Duke because they were the “more physical team”. Even at the half, with Duke leading by six, "Sir Charles" said he was confident Arizona would win. So much for Billy Packer’s shit-fest saying that the TNT crew did not know college basketball sufficiently to handle the TV chores this year.

NASCAR TALK: SOMETHING YOU WON’T HEAR FROM OUR LOCAL SPORTS TALKERS!

I don’t know NASCAR from NASA, but I do know that after NASCAR peaked in terms of fan popularity about five years ago, it was going to decline. I guess that idiom “what goes up must come down”, which is a generalization of any "lucky streak" also pertains to NASCAR. The stock market cannot continue to go up forever, but will have to crash; the same can be said about NASCAR.


As the NFL and the NFLPA head to court paying their respective legal teams millions of dollars as they figure out how to divvy up $9B in revenue annually, NASCAR is looking at a much gloomier economic picture. No, the drivers and the pit crews are not going to strike; it is the sport of NASCAR itself that is in the midst of rough economic times. Consider this info from SportsBusinessDaily.com:


From 2007 through 2010, attendance at NASCAR races fell 16%.
From 2007 through 2010, TV ratings for NASCAR races fell 19%.

Therefore, people are not merely staying home to watch the races.

By NASCAR’s count, 25% of the seats at this year’s race at Bristol (TN) Motor Speedway, whose motto: “Racin’ the way it ought’a be”, were empty.


There was a time when people were writing that NASCAR was “America’s fastest growing sport” and multiple thousands of loyal fans would drive long distances in their RVs to attend NASCAR events. When gas prices are near or above $3 a gallon, driving an RV a great distance becomes an economic event all by itself without considering that NASCAR tickets are not paid for with pocket change. Unemployment, the economy in general, and rising gas prices have hit NASCAR where it hurts in terms of live attendance.

However, that does not explain the drop in TV ratings for NASCAR. Even I tuned in to parts of several races a few years ago to see what the fuss was all about, but seeing no fiery crashes in those few races turned me off from further viewing of the sport.

One might suspect that loyal NASCAR fans who could not afford to drive 500 miles each way to see a race live would sit back in front of their HD television sets and watch that same race. However, the numbers say otherwise; fans are staying home and tuning in to something else or doing something else.

Some NASCAR people think that the TV problems are due to the switch of races from ABC to ESPN. Most sports think coverage by ESPN is a huge plus; some NASCAR believers think ESPN hurt their ratings. For those folks, the question is this: So why did the ratings for NASCAR on FOX drop, too? Those races stayed on the same network and people tuned out.

NASCAR seems to have suffered from the same strategic misreading that the NHL did. Both organizations had highly successful operations in a regional sport. Both decided they would undertake a “national expansion”. The NHL put teams in Miami, Phoenix, Atlanta and the like; NASCAR started racing in places like Chicago, Indianapolis, Las Vegas, Kansas (twice), Watkins Glen; you get the idea. Hockey is not “native” to Phoenix; NASCAR is not “native” to Kansas.


What both NASCAR and the NHL have discovered is that their dedicated fan base in their home region is not easy to duplicate in some part of the country where their sport has no history. Neither sport will collapse because of its ill-conceived expansion, but both sports should begin to look for graceful ways to pull back from those expansions and get back to what they did in the past.

NEW YORK CITY TABLOIDS: KNICKS STILL SUCK!

NBA TRIVIA:

What is the only NBA team that has never had a Duke player on its roster? Answer is below.

NOMINEE #2 FOR "FEEL-GOOD” MOVIE OF 2011: "HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN"

ANSWER TO TRIVIA:

Although Mike Krzyzewski was once a potential candidate for the LA Laker coaching in 2004, but turned down the job, enabling Rudy Tomjanovich to take the vacant position, no Duke player has ever played for the Minnesota/LA Lakers in the franchise’s 60-plus years that it has been in the NBA.

GUS JOHNSON AKA "MR. HYSTERICS"

I feel bad for Len Elmore, Gus Johnson's NCAA Tournament partner. When Johnson's done with his self-promotional hysterics, what's Elmore to do? Speak his usual calm, clear observations, as if Johnson just badly overdid it? Or also get crazy-loud, so as not to embarrass Johnson. Below are some Johnson sound bites to show you what I mean:






COMPARING THE NCAA TOURNAMENT TO A DINING EXPERIENCE

Speaking of the NCAA Tournament, its three weekends are similar to various dining experiences. Last weekend was like going to eat at a buffet. There is plenty of food; some of it is very good; most of it is okay; a little of it ain’t worth shit. That is sort of how those 48 games went; quantity rules the day.

Next weekend will be the Final Four. That is like going to eat at a top-shelf restaurant in NYC featuring small portions of the top cuisine. You know the odds are in your favor that the food will taste great, but there will not be a lot of it. You will remember the experience of this meal once your credit card statement arrives at the end of the month. Next weekend is the triumph of quality over quantity.

The games this weekend form a bridge between quantity and quality. There are 12 games to watch; there will be no need to juggle four networks at the same time on your remote. The teams still active are either very good teams or teams that have gotten themselves into a very positive rhythm or both. This weekend is like dining at your favorite upscale restaurant where the food is ample and delicious and the price does not require taking out a second mortgage.



SOME MORE ILLITERATE TENNESSEE FANS!

YO GENO, JUST WIN BABY AND KEEP TOUR MOUTH SHUT!

In the NCAA Women’s Basketball Tournament, UConn advanced to the Sweet 16 to the surprise of exactly no one who has paid any attention to collegiate sports over the past decade. Nevertheless, Coach Geno Auriemma was upset because less than 6,000 fans showed up to see UConn play its final game in its own gym this year. That means that more than 40% of the seats were empty. Auriemma thinks UConn fans are spoiled and should have turned out in greater numbers to see a team that has won 112 of its last 113 games. Auriemma said he will ask the UConn athletic director not to bid to host the women’s tournament for the next five years.

Memo to Geno: If you think there were empty seats for your home tournament game in the second round of the tournament, just imagine how sparse the attendance will be when next year’s second round game is in Long Center Arena at the University of Scranton. And don’t forget that the UConn men’s team is out in Anaheim, CA, so I would suspect some of the women’s followers were saving their energy and budget for the men’s team, which if it wins today will be going to Houston next weekend for the Final Four. Just shut up and win baby; if you hadn't lost to Stanford and instead had a 113-game winning streak, you would have had a larger crowd.

THAD MOTTA LOOKALIKES

Whenever I see Ohio State coach, Thad Matta, on my TV screen, I think I have accidentally changed the channel to Sesame Street, and am watching either Bert or Statler of the two grumpy old men in the balcony, Waldorf and Statler.

 

 

CRIER’S CORNER



BASKETBALL ACTION


Yesterday’s Record ATS: 8-2


W - NEW JERSEY (+13) over ORLANDO*
L - INDIANA* (-6.5) over SACRAMENTO
W - CHARLOTTE (+13) over BOSTON*
W - MINNESOTA (+15.5) over OKLAHOMA CITY*
W - DENVER* (-16.5) over WASHINGTON


Prudential Center – Newark, NJ
W - MARQUETTE vs. NORTH CAROLINA (TOTAL UNDER 150)
L - OHIO STATE vs. KENTUCKY (TOTAL OVER 140)


Alamodome – San Antonio, TX
W - KANSAS (-10.5) over RICHMOND
W - VCU (+3.5) over FLORIDA STATE


CIT
W - SANTA CLARA (+3.5) over SMU*


Cumulative Season Record ATS (excludes “pushes”): 567-345

Today’s Action (for reading purposes only):

NBA



CHARLOTTE* (+4) over NEW YORK
Listening to New York Coach D’Antoni, you just get the feeling that he doesn’t really believe his team is committed enough to bear down and play defense. Sure, there is a buzz in the Garden with Melo capable of putting up 40 or more on any given night, but he plays defense once in a blue moon. CHARLOTTE, 105-95


DALLAS (-5.5) over UTAH*
Salt Lake City used to be a tough place to play, but that changed quickly as the franchise was dismantled. Shawn Marion had been undervalued by the Mavericks, but since being inserted into the starting line-up, the man known as the Matrix has been running the floor and going to the glass with a vengeance. Jason Terry is the key to the second unit for Dallas and when he is on, they are extremely tough. DALLAS, 106-95

LA CLIPPERS* (-11.5) over TORONTO
This week’s newsletter says: “...one of the bright spots [for the Clippers] has been center DeAndre Jordan. The former Texas A&M star can jump out of the gym, has started to become a dominant shot blocker and will only improve with experience...” Just so happens the dude missed two games recently, then returned last night against the Lakers. The Clippers were underwhemling in all three, understandably so. But in this match-up, they can now overwhelm Toronto with their frontcourt play as the Raptors, a pretty sorry and soft team, play the final game of a long road trip where they've already lost by 30+ points twice. LA CLIPPERS, 110-94



COLLEGE HOOPS

NCAA

SOUTHEAST REGION at New Orleans, LA

Superdome – New Orleans, LA
BUTLER (+4) over FLORIDA

WEST REGION at Anaheim, CA

Honda Center - Anaheim, CA
ARIZONA (+2.5) over CONNECTICUT

CIT
IONA (-2.5) over EAST TENNESSEE STATE*

MIKE IN DA
HMW